Why are people not responding to you favorably? If this is happening more frequently, you may be going through a ‘sour season’ causing you to act in a ‘backup style’. A backup style reflects our typical responses when we run out of energy, patience or feel like it’s not worth it – preventing us from being our best. Let’s explore one perspective.
The researchers at Professional DynaMetric Programs (PDP), alongside leading behavioral scientists, provided critical scientific research from working adults, describing how people respond in situations and seasons when we are out of energy and patience.
When people are tired, stressed, and energy is depleted, we can become irritable and irrational. When we see and experience people and situations through one or more backup style lenses, we do not react, respond or perform at our best.
When challenged with keeping our cool, staying calm and delivering hi-performance in the face of stress and depletion, our goal should be to avoid being overtaken by one of the following backup styles. Some backgrounds, styles and tendencies may demonstrate more than one backup style simultaneously.
BACKUP STYLES DEFINED*
When all else fails, you turn into a dictatorial steamroller. You overpower with force, disregard other feelings or dictate orders under extreme conditions.
When all else fails, you give exhaustive explanations if you feel cornered, ignored or not appreciated and valued. Extreme responses are interrupting, talking too much, overpowering with persuasion and launching verbal attacks.
You may avoid conflict but have a ‘get you later’ attitude, choose avoidance to not make a scene, reaching a bursting point and unloading, and resisting change.
Must Be Right
You silently collect the proof and bury everyone with facts. In extreme circumstances, you might show inflexibility in words and body language; become alarmed with what might go wrong; and can hinder or stop work flow.
*From PDP, Inc. copyrighted materials (ProScan manual and reports).
BE MINDFUL, ALERT AND OPEN
You may not do any of these, but you will at least feel like it. This can emote all kinds of bad juju to those around you. Being mindful, alert and open to direct/indirect feedback can help you know when you might be demonstrating one or more of these styles.
Performance coaching can help people learn, grow and recover from these outbursts/reactions to prevent personal and/or professional derailment.